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I'd be doing a lot more than just killing you in that case…
[ he is not the elysium who'd choose thorns in a trolley problem. he feels well enough to drive… in theory… at least, he wouldn't actively want to cause anyone any problems on the road. ]
It's a short drive, but try to rest up for a bit.
[ he is not the elysium who'd choose thorns in a trolley problem. he feels well enough to drive… in theory… at least, he wouldn't actively want to cause anyone any problems on the road. ]
It's a short drive, but try to rest up for a bit.
[ ugghhh fine. he will relax.
except, relax just means he will spend the whole ride staring at elysium. there doesn't seem to be any purpose behind the stare other than to simply look at him as he tries to figure out his jumbled emotions.
he supposes elysium must have figured him out, although thorns isn't sure how; he doesn't think he's acted anything other than platonic this whole time, since he thinks elysium was asleep when the incident that actually got him caught happened. hmm. ]
except, relax just means he will spend the whole ride staring at elysium. there doesn't seem to be any purpose behind the stare other than to simply look at him as he tries to figure out his jumbled emotions.
he supposes elysium must have figured him out, although thorns isn't sure how; he doesn't think he's acted anything other than platonic this whole time, since he thinks elysium was asleep when the incident that actually got him caught happened. hmm. ]
[ what he wants to know is why thorns is so much more invested in this scenario than any other they've ever played out before. he is so confused.
but more than that, excuse him? who's slacking?? ]
That's only because you keep spoiling our kids. They deserve the world, sure, but gold-plated fencing? Farm-to-table produce every single day? I had to do what I had to do.
[ THEY GET TREATED BETTER THAN ELYSIUM!!!! which, valid. but elysium is a brat here. ]
The only option left to sustain our lifestyle was selling my body… but you won't even let me do that…
[ there is the occasional person who's standing around that picks up whiffs of their conversation. they are even more confused. ]
but more than that, excuse him? who's slacking?? ]
That's only because you keep spoiling our kids. They deserve the world, sure, but gold-plated fencing? Farm-to-table produce every single day? I had to do what I had to do.
[ THEY GET TREATED BETTER THAN ELYSIUM!!!! which, valid. but elysium is a brat here. ]
The only option left to sustain our lifestyle was selling my body… but you won't even let me do that…
[ there is the occasional person who's standing around that picks up whiffs of their conversation. they are even more confused. ]
[ what kind of resting is this… he fights the urge to squirm, keeping his eyes fixed on the road ahead. the rearview mirror still gives him a decent enough view of thorns though, which he's also trying to pointedly ignore.
they are so lucky the road's empty. ]
You're only realising how good of a view you had now?
[ stop. ]
they are so lucky the road's empty. ]
You're only realising how good of a view you had now?
[ stop. ]
[ thorns just shakes his head. internally he's wondering how feasible gold-plated fencing even is, that seems stupid. it would get damaged by the elements, gold is such a soft metal...
they, at least, reach the area with little shops. ]
It's really like a man to blame someone else.
[ thorns you are also a man. ]
they, at least, reach the area with little shops. ]
It's really like a man to blame someone else.
[ thorns you are also a man. ]
[ okay, thorns had officially reached a point where he can't pretend this is anything other than blatant flirting. he is still confused though, because why is elysium doing this if he's over thorns?
is he... a whore?
... ]
I figured that out a few weeks ago.
is he... a whore?
... ]
I figured that out a few weeks ago.
You used to say I made you happy.
[ okay. elysium is the bastard man in this scenario considering he made the decision to work at a host club. he could've stayed an honest man… he has so many complaints but he will continue to go with it…? ]
The kids changed you.
[ elysium is rethinking their victoria honeymoon. but also, thorns seems to enjoy drama? whack. ]
[ okay. elysium is the bastard man in this scenario considering he made the decision to work at a host club. he could've stayed an honest man… he has so many complaints but he will continue to go with it…? ]
The kids changed you.
[ elysium is rethinking their victoria honeymoon. but also, thorns seems to enjoy drama? whack. ]
[ thorns opens his mouth to respond, but then a bystander just mutters 'they have kids...?' and he has to quickly turn his head to not laugh at the question.
okay. roleplay over. ]
Come on, let's go into this store. It's clothes.
[ they can't buy anything from it yet but it's good to know what their future options will be. ]
okay. roleplay over. ]
Come on, let's go into this store. It's clothes.
[ they can't buy anything from it yet but it's good to know what their future options will be. ]
[
he does not know how to react to this. unfortunately, he is like a man in an arid desert and he is desperately grasping the opportunity like he's found an oasis after several years? he can't fumble?
this is such a farcry from the other thread. ]
Yeah? How did that happen?
[ tries to sound chill only to pitch himself higher anyway ]
he does not know how to react to this. unfortunately, he is like a man in an arid desert and he is desperately grasping the opportunity like he's found an oasis after several years? he can't fumble?
this is such a farcry from the other thread. ]
Yeah? How did that happen?
[ tries to sound chill only to pitch himself higher anyway ]
[ little does he know, they do have kids. they've abandoned every single one of them.
but elysium just sighs and shakes his head… but like flicking a switch, he's immediately into looking around. ]
Oh. Maybe not clothes, but we should get hats if we're going to be working out in the sun.
[ there are cute sunhats… absolutely not intended for physical labour, but elysium places one adorned with ribbon atop thorns' head anyway.
he explodes. his wife is so cute. he needs to explode the bastard version of himself he doesn't deserve a wife and kids everything he did was his fault!!!! ]
but elysium just sighs and shakes his head… but like flicking a switch, he's immediately into looking around. ]
Oh. Maybe not clothes, but we should get hats if we're going to be working out in the sun.
[ there are cute sunhats… absolutely not intended for physical labour, but elysium places one adorned with ribbon atop thorns' head anyway.
he explodes. his wife is so cute. he needs to explode the bastard version of himself he doesn't deserve a wife and kids everything he did was his fault!!!! ]
[ the way they are having this conversation on a car ride where they are not even next to each other. amazing.
thorns just continues to look at the side of his face. ]
I don't know. It fully hit me at the wedding though.
[ you know. the event that elysium can't remember like half of. ]
thorns just continues to look at the side of his face. ]
I don't know. It fully hit me at the wedding though.
[ you know. the event that elysium can't remember like half of. ]
[ the way they're even having a conversation at all. incredible. ]
Not even when we were modeling…?
[ it sounds like he's complaining about this but
he's legitimately going through it, very briefly putting his head down on his aheel at a traffic light. the person behind him honks; he groans and starts moving again. what he and thorns thinks is attractive differs. wild. ]
It should've been when we were modeling.
[ grumbles again. ]
Not even when we were modeling…?
[ it sounds like he's complaining about this but
he's legitimately going through it, very briefly putting his head down on his aheel at a traffic light. the person behind him honks; he groans and starts moving again. what he and thorns thinks is attractive differs. wild. ]
It should've been when we were modeling.
[ grumbles again. ]
Are you criticizing when I had an epiphany?
[ he's going to kill him.
but thorns has always known elysium is attractive, that's not really the problem. but the modeling job had happened right after elysium revealed his old (or not old?) feelings, and thorns was struggling to come to terms with that. the last thing he was going to do was focus on his own emotions when he was coming to terms with that he hurt his best friend. ]
[ he's going to kill him.
but thorns has always known elysium is attractive, that's not really the problem. but the modeling job had happened right after elysium revealed his old (or not old?) feelings, and thorns was struggling to come to terms with that. the last thing he was going to do was focus on his own emotions when he was coming to terms with that he hurt his best friend. ]
[ not the violence against this au... is it better or worse than the one where they become slugs?
thorns just tugs at the hat, testing out how it feels despite it definitely not being meant for work. he's taking it so seriously though. ]
You're right... The sun can really be brutal...
[ he should have had a hat when he was stuck on the flats...... ]
thorns just tugs at the hat, testing out how it feels despite it definitely not being meant for work. he's taking it so seriously though. ]
You're right... The sun can really be brutal...
[ he should have had a hat when he was stuck on the flats...... ]
[ this is about to be so disastrous as elysium has reached the threshold where he believes he needs to fill in the dead air or he will die. ]
… Yeah. You could've pulled a dramatic reversal. 'I was into you this entire time, too.' … something like that.
But maybe that would've just raised its own problems. Like, did you only figure it out because you finally hit puberty…?
[ instead, they can both die when thorns inevitably wants to end him then himself. he really needs to stop running his mouth. ]
Wait. That can still be it. [ … ] Is that how it is? I'd be fine with it.
[ he doesn't know in another universe it was the other way around ]
… Yeah. You could've pulled a dramatic reversal. 'I was into you this entire time, too.' … something like that.
But maybe that would've just raised its own problems. Like, did you only figure it out because you finally hit puberty…?
[ instead, they can both die when thorns inevitably wants to end him then himself. he really needs to stop running his mouth. ]
Wait. That can still be it. [ … ] Is that how it is? I'd be fine with it.
[ he doesn't know in another universe it was the other way around ]
[ bursts into tears it's worse because as slugs they're at least together harmoniously ]
… It's cute, but not very practical. [ he places a hand on thorns' head. ] I'll have to save up to buy it for you.
[ their budget… this is the reality they're in now… forget a diamond ring unless thorns can suddenly transmute gold. ]
We have to make our first date as newlyweds special.
[ they don't even have a wedding date. ]
… It's cute, but not very practical. [ he places a hand on thorns' head. ] I'll have to save up to buy it for you.
[ their budget… this is the reality they're in now… forget a diamond ring unless thorns can suddenly transmute gold. ]
We have to make our first date as newlyweds special.
[ they don't even have a wedding date. ]
[ this may be the worst confession of all time, lads.
this is thorns' first one and he does not know how to react to this reaction, even though elysium is clearly doing the thing where he rambles because he's nervous. but thorns has no idea what he should be responding to here. so much is happening. ]
Feel free to crash the car.
[ put him out of his misery.... ]
this is thorns' first one and he does not know how to react to this reaction, even though elysium is clearly doing the thing where he rambles because he's nervous. but thorns has no idea what he should be responding to here. so much is happening. ]
Feel free to crash the car.
[ put him out of his misery.... ]
—Physical attraction is a normal thing, is what I wanted to say!!!! Let's not get drastic…
[ he has lived the entire last few weeks thinking thorns doesn't have eyes? he has eyes but not like that. ]
Love can come after. You don't need to feel guilty about it. My——parents. My parents didn't raise a quitter. You already know, don't you?
[ he has lived the entire last few weeks thinking thorns doesn't have eyes? he has eyes but not like that. ]
Love can come after. You don't need to feel guilty about it. My——parents. My parents didn't raise a quitter. You already know, don't you?
[ thorns continues to just look at elysium, thinking once again of how unfortunate this is going. elysium literally just left the hospital after a deeply unflattering procedure and this is where they are now.
he turns to stare out the window instead. ]
Love can come after?
he turns to stare out the window instead. ]
Love can come after?
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