[ what wouldn't thorns tolerate? that's the real problem. still, he's right; it's getting late. his laugh punctuates the thought before he clicks the car open. ]
Don't think I've forgotten about the review you were supposed to give me.
[ how was it as a hangout… their platonic night ride ]
whatever disbelief he wants to express at this is promptly discarded when the rat crawls in by the passenger side. it sniffs thorns' shoe. sniiiiiiiiff.
thorns will just try to shoo the rat out of the door? he unbuckles his seatbelt and leans over elysium to try to get it out from his side. this is so stupid. ]
[ he's a sheltered kid who never ran away from home thorns probably has to kill all the c*ckroaches and sp*ders that show up too
thorns, being the closest thing he has to physical and moral support is an unfortunate casualty of elysium's weenieisms. he ends up clinging onto him, making this infinitely harder for them both, all while making this a bigger deal than it has to be by whimpering into thorns' ear. this is the least fine he's been!!!!!!! goodbye!!!!!!!!!! ]
[ this is bbbb behavior but he is not a bbbb in this timeline.
but it is indeed so much harder to take care of this while elysium is clutching him. if anyone were to pass by and glance through their window, it would appear as if they were messing around, yet in reality it is so much worse than that. at the very least, the rat does end up hopping out because all of the commotion that elysium is making is freaking it out. ]
[ he can still be thorns' bbbb… except thorns is just as much of a bbbb, which leaves them stuck as two useless bottoms together the majority of their time. good thing they're out in the middle of nowhere? imagine this happening on campus with security getting called on them. ]
You're lying. I don't believe you…
[ this is what happens when you troll one too many times. he sniffles, clutching onto him harder. thorns brought this on them both. ]
[ hello!! all thorns did was try to get the rat out, he had no control over how nimble it was... goodbye, romeo, forever. you will be dearly missed (by me).
[ he is unsure if elysium is in the right state to handle a vehicle at the moment, he might have a panic attack and kill them both over their long lost romeo. ]
[ the attack on his composure sobers him up… slightly… he peels himself away from thorns with great reluctance, eyes darting around wildly before he forces in a deep breath. then he shuts his door, hand settling back on the wheel.
thorns reluctantly sits back in his seat and puts his seatbelt back on, deeply unsure of how this night is going to end. actually every stop has been weird. can't believe they started out watching bake-off. ]
[ there were probably more than a couple of close calls when he had to swerve in and out of traffic like an insane person, leaving people behind him honking. it's fine.
they're both totally different men by the time this is over. elysium, on the other hand, looks completely refreshed. romeo who? ]
Wasn't that fun? [ he gets smacked but acts like solid rock. ] We should do that again.
[ this is how elysium becomes crazy in this threat too.
but thorns will exit the vehicle and just starts walking to the building without waiting for his bestie to catch up. he saw death so many times on the drive here... ]
[ ordinarily, this would be fine. ordinarily, elysium would be laughing all the way back to their apartment and is up until he remembers one, awful thing.
THEY HAVE SO MANY GROCERIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thorns is so far away so he has to shout across the parking lot. ]
——Hey!!! Aren't you forgetting something? We have stuff to take in!!
that stop was so long ago that thorns forgot already. they should have just offered the rat some snacks to appease it... but thorns turns around and begrudgingly returns to help. ]
[ the real reason that thorns did not give elysium a proper rating is because he is not considering the "date" done until they are inside. everything since the rat freak out and the drive back is being considered for his final verdict. ]
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[ what wouldn't thorns tolerate? that's the real problem. still, he's right; it's getting late. his laugh punctuates the thought before he clicks the car open. ]
Don't think I've forgotten about the review you were supposed to give me.
[ how was it as a hangout… their platonic night ride ]
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but thorns slides into his seat, taking his time to put his seatbelt on and get settled. ]
Mm. You did spend half of it with a rat, so I don't' know.
[ that was his fault. ]
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whatever disbelief he wants to express at this is promptly discarded when the rat crawls in by the passenger side. it sniffs thorns' shoe. sniiiiiiiiff.
what the fuck! ]
You're taking care of that.
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[ whoa... is this true love? true rat love?
thorns makes no move to try to get rid of the rat because he doesn't believe this is his problem. ]
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[ idk it looks like it's into thorns' feet? it sniffs his other foot. ]
We're not taking that back with us.
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wiggles out of his grip and leaps into elysium's side.
his mess now. ]
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as much as he knows this rat exists, he freaks out with a yelp and a start, hitting his head on the ceiling, thereby freaking out the rat in turn.
it probably decides it wants nothing to do with both of them. ]
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thorns will just try to shoo the rat out of the door? he unbuckles his seatbelt and leans over elysium to try to get it out from his side. this is so stupid. ]
Wow...
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thorns, being the closest thing he has to physical and moral support is an unfortunate casualty of elysium's weenieisms. he ends up clinging onto him, making this infinitely harder for them both, all while making this a bigger deal than it has to be by whimpering into thorns' ear. this is the least fine he's been!!!!!!! goodbye!!!!!!!!!! ]
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but it is indeed so much harder to take care of this while elysium is clutching him. if anyone were to pass by and glance through their window, it would appear as if they were messing around, yet in reality it is so much worse than that. at the very least, the rat does end up hopping out because all of the commotion that elysium is making is freaking it out. ]
It's gone.
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You're lying. I don't believe you…
[ this is what happens when you troll one too many times. he sniffles, clutching onto him harder. thorns brought this on them both. ]
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thorns pats him consolingly. ]
It went out your door. It's gone.
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and as much as elysium would like to think about how comforting thorns is being, this is just too much. ]
If it's still there, I'm charging you for emotional damage.
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[ he is unsure if elysium is in the right state to handle a vehicle at the moment, he might have a panic attack and kill them both over their long lost romeo. ]
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[ the attack on his composure sobers him up… slightly… he peels himself away from thorns with great reluctance, eyes darting around wildly before he forces in a deep breath. then he shuts his door, hand settling back on the wheel.
they are absolutely going to die. ]
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thorns reluctantly sits back in his seat and puts his seatbelt back on, deeply unsure of how this night is going to end. actually every stop has been weird. can't believe they started out watching bake-off. ]
... I'm ready to trade seats any time.
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this is how he ends up speeding the rest of the way home :) wahoo ]
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once they are back, and presumably in one piece, thorns will reach over to smack him over the head the moment they are parked. ]
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they're both totally different men by the time this is over. elysium, on the other hand, looks completely refreshed. romeo who? ]
Wasn't that fun? [ he gets smacked but acts like solid rock. ] We should do that again.
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[ this is how elysium becomes crazy in this threat too.
but thorns will exit the vehicle and just starts walking to the building without waiting for his bestie to catch up. he saw death so many times on the drive here... ]
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THEY HAVE SO MANY GROCERIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thorns is so far away so he has to shout across the parking lot. ]
——Hey!!! Aren't you forgetting something? We have stuff to take in!!
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that stop was so long ago that thorns forgot already. they should have just offered the rat some snacks to appease it... but thorns turns around and begrudgingly returns to help. ]
Tch.
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[ he shoves a bunch of things into thorns' arms. he will have to waddle. ]
Half of this is you.
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[ the real reason that thorns did not give elysium a proper rating is because he is not considering the "date" done until they are inside. everything since the rat freak out and the drive back is being considered for his final verdict. ]
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[ he gives thorns a light kick. ill-advised, given the armful of groceries, but he needs to stave off the aggression somehow before he explodes. ]
What, did you want the full real-date treatment?
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