We can still have plants. [ … ] Instead of chasing the uninhabitable, what if we looked for somewhere we'd actually want to stay?
[ he still has his lakeside cabin dreams—living off the land, tending a garden, keeping chickens… and now, apparently, an entire capybara. ]
We could build up our names as a travelling apothecary and his assistant, set up shop every so often at nearby settlements. It'll be a little like a fairytale.
[ they just ignore one even smaller thing and it's peachy!! perfectly peachy!! ]
[ it does actually sound nice, as long as they don't think about the terminal disease looming behind them. thorns doesn't want the town to find out elysium has oripathy though, so it's difficult to find out where is the closest area with a decent enough treatment provider. even though the doctor here seemed professional enough when it came up in casual converation, thorns has not seen a single person with obvious symptoms yet. and while it could just be that they're covering them up like elysium is, it could also be a bad sign.
...
he raises elysium's hand to his mouth to kiss the back of it. ]
[ because life isn't a fairytale, and at most, they're dreams. happily ever afters never account for who gets left behind, the inevitable downturns that make you appreciate what you have, or how all stories, no matter how sweet, must end.
he smiles, a little wistfully, hand tightening around thorns'. ]
… My condition's stable enough that we don't need to worry for a while. I can stretch out the medication I have and make it last. We never really talked about it before, but it was always going to come up eventually, wasn't it?
[ if thorns ends up freaking out about his treatments and resorting to black market tactics he'll take himself out; as unhinged as they are for each other—they have principles because of that just as well. ]
I don't want it hanging over your head like a guillotine. We can still do what we want—more, even. There's still time for that.
[ whether he's trying to convince himself or thorns, well, they're one and the same now so maybe it doesn't matter. ]
[ he's surprised that he brought it up. in general, they have both been avoiding any kind of difficult conversation that may shake up their current trajectory. while the timeline shenanigans have been alluded to, they don't outright discuss it. they don't talk about how the long term effects of elysium's illness will make a lot of their plans difficult, unless they eventually open up communications with rhodes again.
speaking of rhodes, just leaving them at all. while thorns knows elysium would choose him over that company, the choice still couldn't have been an easy one; while thorns was attached to them, elysium was much more so. he could barely even look at mantra without it being obvious that he felt guilt about the choices he was making when it came to her specifically. ]
You need to tell me when it starts to get bad, Elysium. Getting blindsided by it will hurt a lot worse than being aware.
[ one of the (many) perks of the corazonix is that thorns can monitor for health with it, but to get a properly detailed reading would require elysium's participation, so there's only so much he can do sneakily there. ]
[ elysium isn't dense. after everything they've given up for each other, after dismantling every obstacle that stood in their way, the only thing left is his oripathy. and yet, that isn't something they can just conquer through love or sheer will like everything they have before.
it's an unavoidable conversation. an unfair and ultimately cruel one, but in the end—there is one choice they could make that would make sure there isn't someone left behind. but until they arrive at it, can't they live as a dream? just as two men as they are, in love. ]
You haven't used that one in a while. [ elysium, he means, and he breathes a lightless laugh. ] I mean it. Us Infected would be useless on long-term missions if our conditions could worsen that easily. And even if I wanted to hide it from you, you know tjat isn't possible.
[ the crystals' spread is obvious enough, but so are the coughing fits, the gradual deterioration of the body that follows. he's lived through it too many times in futile attempts to turn the clock back; it feels strange, almost detached, to think about the symptoms this way now.
but he knows thorns could never see it like that. ]
Let's make everything count. We did this so we could live with each other, Thorns. Not for.
[ he supposes that he is just going to have to trust him, in the end. what a scary concept.
thorns leans forward to press a kiss to his mouth, and then another. he would go for a third but the capybara starts to chew on him again, and it's enough to just make him huff out a laugh and pull away. ]
Right. We'll work things out when the time comes for it.
[ they can worry about it all they want right now, but then they'd be missing opportunities to do things while elysium's health is still fine. it's difficult to push the thought away, but no one knows elysium's body better than he does. ]
[ there's no one they trust more than the other. by the same token, there's no one they trust less than the other. he can talk all he wants about living for the sum of their parts, but it's hard to just inherently shut off the part that wants to give everything and anything that he can for thorns.
is this how he gets the host job in the alternate universe? so he dabbles in the black market for his drugs?? much to think about. ]
There it is! [ he chirps it back. ] We should probably come up with a name before we drop it off. What're we going to tell the guy? Take care of this burdenbeast we kidnapped for us?
[ he wants to ask how did he hear about that, but if anyone gets hold of gossip then it would be elysium.
still, how to answer that... it's true that the doctor is someone he trusts deeply, and he knows that if he just showed up back there now, he'd just get a light reprimand before being welcome back. in other lives, when other operators were scared about being around pirates, the doctor would always be the first on the ship to greet thorns and his crew. ]
They're a good person. They're likely doing better than we are.
[ love how ak has established mantra loves gossip. and then she has elysium and raidian… apples don't fall far from the tree.
the way they're just permanently haunted by their ex now, too. fun. and while elysium had mentioned the braid thing to poke fun at thorns, there is something legitimately concerning about what he'd just said, warranting the slightest of pauses. ]
Yeah? How would you say we're doing comparatively?
[ thorns is not going to ignore the fact that they may be forced to go back depending on elysium's health, or if something major happens where there isn't really any other choice but to initiate contact with rhodes island again. but to do so for anything less than an emergency? what would even be the point of them leaving in the first place? ]
[ for the first time since they've made their runaway, the atmosphere between them grows awkward. he just stares at thorns for a long few beats—so much for talking about it! let's never do that again. it can be their point of contention when it arises; it is what it is.
coincidentally, the farmer shows up in the distance and begins approaching, wondering what they're doing standing around and not saying anything? ]
Sure. [ … ] Doctor it is.
[ —then he turns and waves back! they have a child they need to temporarily shelter. ]
thorns lets it drop because elysium does, and he lets elysium handle the explanation. the farmer happily will let docbara stay on the form, but does ask if they can use it every now and then if possible in exchange.
thorns nods his head. the alternative would be getting charged for for it, so sure. ]
[ it truly feels like forever since they last got to flirt… he squeezes thorns' hand back through all the brooding.
when they get paid—it's both more than expected and with treats from excursion. the chief says it's for the trouble with the bandits, and while it hadn't been any effort at all, he isn't about to turn down the charity.
one thing is pretty clear though: they'd really like to keep them. it's just a little uncomfortable to stomach. ]
[ on one hand, it shouldn't be too surprising. their entire plan when they came here was to make themselves so extremely useful that everyone would want to hire them. of course that would mean the town would become rather reliant on them afterwards.
still, it is much easier to cut ties and run off together during more tense, dangerous moments. when things are nice and calm, guilt tends to catch up. ]
Thanks. We'll get going, then.
[ they are happily excused, because of course the two of them would want some time to themselves after working all day.
[ so what i'm getting from this is that they really need is to live a life of crime and kill more people. got it.
elysium isn't thinking anything close to that. instead, he ends up draping his weight over thorns, not from physical exhaustion but sheer mental fatigue. everyone's been asking about his haircut, yeah, and they say he looks good, but when doesn't he? tch.
by the time they're stumbling back toward the inn, elysium decides— ]
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We'll have to fix that habit somehow. It's too old to be teething…
[ the capybara can hold one hand while elysium holds the other. ]
Let's stop by the library and bookstore and see what we can find after we drop it off at the farm?
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still, he swings elysium's hand and will start to steer them back to the farm. the child continues to nibble. ]
I guess plants would have given us less trouble.
[ ... he wonders if anyone has been watering them. ]
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We can still have plants. [ … ] Instead of chasing the uninhabitable, what if we looked for somewhere we'd actually want to stay?
[ he still has his lakeside cabin dreams—living off the land, tending a garden, keeping chickens… and now, apparently, an entire capybara. ]
We could build up our names as a travelling apothecary and his assistant, set up shop every so often at nearby settlements. It'll be a little like a fairytale.
[ they just ignore one even smaller thing and it's peachy!! perfectly peachy!! ]
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...
he raises elysium's hand to his mouth to kiss the back of it. ]
... That sounds nice. Like a dream.
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[ because life isn't a fairytale, and at most, they're dreams. happily ever afters never account for who gets left behind, the inevitable downturns that make you appreciate what you have, or how all stories, no matter how sweet, must end.
he smiles, a little wistfully, hand tightening around thorns'. ]
… My condition's stable enough that we don't need to worry for a while. I can stretch out the medication I have and make it last. We never really talked about it before, but it was always going to come up eventually, wasn't it?
[ if thorns ends up freaking out about his treatments and resorting to black market tactics he'll take himself out; as unhinged as they are for each other—they have principles because of that just as well. ]
I don't want it hanging over your head like a guillotine. We can still do what we want—more, even. There's still time for that.
[ whether he's trying to convince himself or thorns, well, they're one and the same now so maybe it doesn't matter. ]
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speaking of rhodes, just leaving them at all. while thorns knows elysium would choose him over that company, the choice still couldn't have been an easy one; while thorns was attached to them, elysium was much more so. he could barely even look at mantra without it being obvious that he felt guilt about the choices he was making when it came to her specifically. ]
You need to tell me when it starts to get bad, Elysium. Getting blindsided by it will hurt a lot worse than being aware.
[ one of the (many) perks of the corazonix is that thorns can monitor for health with it, but to get a properly detailed reading would require elysium's participation, so there's only so much he can do sneakily there. ]
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it's an unavoidable conversation. an unfair and ultimately cruel one, but in the end—there is one choice they could make that would make sure there isn't someone left behind. but until they arrive at it, can't they live as a dream? just as two men as they are, in love. ]
You haven't used that one in a while. [ elysium, he means, and he breathes a lightless laugh. ] I mean it. Us Infected would be useless on long-term missions if our conditions could worsen that easily. And even if I wanted to hide it from you, you know tjat isn't possible.
[ the crystals' spread is obvious enough, but so are the coughing fits, the gradual deterioration of the body that follows. he's lived through it too many times in futile attempts to turn the clock back; it feels strange, almost detached, to think about the symptoms this way now.
but he knows thorns could never see it like that. ]
Let's make everything count. We did this so we could live with each other, Thorns. Not for.
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thorns leans forward to press a kiss to his mouth, and then another. he would go for a third but the capybara starts to chew on him again, and it's enough to just make him huff out a laugh and pull away. ]
Right. We'll work things out when the time comes for it.
[ they can worry about it all they want right now, but then they'd be missing opportunities to do things while elysium's health is still fine. it's difficult to push the thought away, but no one knows elysium's body better than he does. ]
There's the farm.
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is this how he gets the host job in the alternate universe? so he dabbles in the black market for his drugs?? much to think about. ]
There it is! [ he chirps it back. ] We should probably come up with a name before we drop it off. What're we going to tell the guy? Take care of this burdenbeast we kidnapped for us?
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[ they saved this poor creature from a life of crime hello.
but a name... thorns starts at it for a long moment, before nodding slowly. ]
Doctor.
[ please name it something else. ]
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[ mumbles. this is so funny considering they literally just had a conversation on this topic. but, okay.
hmmm.
elysium tugs thorns into a stop. ]
I heard you asked the Doctor to make your braid for you, once.
Do you miss them?
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still, how to answer that... it's true that the doctor is someone he trusts deeply, and he knows that if he just showed up back there now, he'd just get a light reprimand before being welcome back. in other lives, when other operators were scared about being around pirates, the doctor would always be the first on the ship to greet thorns and his crew. ]
They're a good person. They're likely doing better than we are.
[ later on the landship is going to explode ]
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the way they're just permanently haunted by their ex now, too. fun. and while elysium had mentioned the braid thing to poke fun at thorns, there is something legitimately concerning about what he'd just said, warranting the slightest of pauses. ]
Yeah? How would you say we're doing comparatively?
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he just nudges elysium with his shoulder. they're at the farm gates by now. ]
Oh. I just mean that they don't have to hustle so much for money. Nothing bad.
[ financially, yes they are in way more trouble than they were at rhodes. but they can manage... ]
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he nudges thorns back, casual as ever. they really are one dialogue choice away from spiraling into a worse bad end at any given time. ]
If you want to go back, we can. I'm not going to accept treatment in the way you think I would if we do, though. If we do it, it'd be for you.
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[ thorns is not going to ignore the fact that they may be forced to go back depending on elysium's health, or if something major happens where there isn't really any other choice but to initiate contact with rhodes island again. but to do so for anything less than an emergency? what would even be the point of them leaving in the first place? ]
I said we'll manage.
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coincidentally, the farmer shows up in the distance and begins approaching, wondering what they're doing standing around and not saying anything? ]
Sure. [ … ] Doctor it is.
[ —then he turns and waves back! they have a child they need to temporarily shelter. ]
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thorns lets it drop because elysium does, and he lets elysium handle the explanation. the farmer happily will let docbara stay on the form, but does ask if they can use it every now and then if possible in exchange.
thorns nods his head. the alternative would be getting charged for for it, so sure. ]
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but they really do need to nuke the day away from existence. after the farmer leaves, there's just a long stretch of silence. ]
Is it too early to head back?
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[ they have gear for a stakeout but they no longer need it with everyone back.
but thorns is not the person to turn to when trying to get out of an awkward atmosphere. so. ]
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a pause. ]
We can pick up our payment, drop off our stuff, then see how we feel from there. That should carry us to late evening.
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[ ...
he squeezes elysium's hand. thorns is aware he is the reason the mood died, at least. ]
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when they get paid—it's both more than expected and with treats from excursion. the chief says it's for the trouble with the bandits, and while it hadn't been any effort at all, he isn't about to turn down the charity.
one thing is pretty clear though: they'd really like to keep them. it's just a little uncomfortable to stomach. ]
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still, it is much easier to cut ties and run off together during more tense, dangerous moments. when things are nice and calm, guilt tends to catch up. ]
Thanks. We'll get going, then.
[ they are happily excused, because of course the two of them would want some time to themselves after working all day.
thorns just looks at elysium. ]
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elysium isn't thinking anything close to that. instead, he ends up draping his weight over thorns, not from physical exhaustion but sheer mental fatigue. everyone's been asking about his haircut, yeah, and they say he looks good, but when doesn't he? tch.
by the time they're stumbling back toward the inn, elysium decides— ]
Sorry.
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