If there's one thing I tell myself, it's that if something happened once, it can happen again—even if it manifests in a different form than what you'd expect. Our friendship is kind of an example of that, yeah? I never thought we'd start talking again, let alone sit here having conversations like this.
[ for someone who usually dodges his own problems, it's almost funny how directly he's facing this one. being with thorns again comes with its own highs and lows, but at least this madness is different from the kind they'd have in a toxic, codependent mess. there's the dawning realisation that this isn't sustainable—and unlike a version of them that might've clung to each other out of desperation, there's the real risk that if they keep going like this, his worst fear will come true: that they'll end up holding each other back from happiness.
so, he has to be better. for him, for thorns. isn't that why he wants to see his girlfriend? so he can feel comforted that he's managed to move on? ]
… I don't know if what I have now is it, or if what comes next will be, but I've decided it's a feeling worth chasing. That's all you can really do. Chase it on your own time, and if it comes, it comes.
[ his hand stills on the dial of the car radio, and after a moment, he turns it off. ]
It's nothing to rush yourself over. Nothing good comes out of being unprepared, anyway. Just know I'll be here. Whatever shape it takes, whatever you decide it is… I'll be supporting you.
thorns is aware of the irony in all of this. there is just something so funny about realizing you might have a crush on someone, and that person turning to have previously liked you but is now over you and is in fact invested in dating other people. but thorns is also aware that he is the last person who is allowed to complain about these circumstances, since it all stems from how little he minded the feelings of others that he didn't even notice what elysium had been trying to tell him all those years ago.
so, he can just suck it up and wait until he gets over this, and elysium never has to know about any of it. that has to be simple, right? ]
... I'm not in any hurry. [ ... ] But good luck. I hope you get what you're looking for.
[ it seems like elysium is actively looking for love. and whether that's just to get over thorns or because he does want to find someone special to him doesn't mattter. all thorns can do is support that decision. it's what a best friend would do... although it may be easier to get over elysium if they didn't hang out as much.
[ strangely, after unloading all of that, he feels lighter, like something in his chest has eased. his smile turns sheepish, and he gives thorns' shoulder a quick punch, half-playful, half in self-deprecation. ]
I talked big about my girlfriend, but… I don't think it's working out. [ SHE DOESN'T EXIST ] Still—! Thanks to this, I think I can finally start moving forward.
[ moving forward being him bringing someone new back every week… how did we get here… the vibe of if you do not fucking get along with my roommate i'm not dating you levels of insanity and are you dating me or youR ROOMMATE!!! phase two of romcom ]
thorns blows elysium up with his mind as he wonders why couldn't he say that about the girlfriend earlier. then again, since elysium doesn't like him anymore that doesn't really matter, but it at least could have saved them some of the more awkward lines of questioning that were thrown at them.
he also can't complain about this because he had just asked to meet the girlfriend, so it makes no sense to suddenly be against other people he might date. but thorns was picturing going out somewhere to do a meeting and not walking out into his living room to see someone on elysium's lap (delusion)
of course, he doesn't voice any of this. instead he offers a thumbs up. ]
It's cool. Just try to give me a heads up if you remember to.
thorns, meanwhile, goes back to staring out the window as he regrets every decision that brought them to this exact place. unlike elysium, thorns does not think dating around might make him move on because it takes him so long just to open up to someone to be friends.
maybe he need more... hobbies? he considers going for the modeling gig for real. ]
this does mean the rest of the ride back can finally be spent in peace. elysium doesn't have to keep pretending kitten exists just to convince thorns he's moved on, and for once, he's actually hopeful he might be able to this time, in a different way from the denial he'd had after high school. everything's out in the open, they're still friends, life is good!!
i can timeskip it to the next weekend if there's nothing else. sniffle ]
that's fine, thorns just spends the week hating everything and messaging the modeling people to ask if they're still interested in him... they say yes... so that is now a thing. ]
this is awkward. but there's no reason to immediately jump to it being a romantic interest because elysium does actually have friends. thorns puts his stuff down and then goes to grab a drink from the fridge.
[ that's fine; alhaitham is not the type to care. he continues flipping through the pages of his book without so much as being disturbed.
when elysium drops down beside him, he immediately sprawls across the rest of the couch, leaning into him and asking what he's reading. the vibe is friendly, easy. they end up talking about their classes—well, more accurately, elysium ends up talking at him about their classes, with alhaitham quietly listening even as the book remains open in his hands.
i'm dying and need this arc to end. i was going to have scien cameo but i am not strong enough? coughs up blood his questionable thorns adjacents ]
[ GOTTA GO FAST… neither of them disturb thorns on his way back to his room and it's only after that he finds out they literally have not said a single word to each other. okay. there's some chagrined comment about how he has zero social skills and isn't this kind of nostalgic…?
at some point during the evening there's a knock on thorns' door. it's elysium. ]
My— [ hmm. pauses. ] Alhaitham's having problems with his roommate. I've known him since our first year. Would you mind if he stayed with us for a bit?
[ okay. cool. elysium picks up what thorns is putting down and visibly brightens, clapping thorns' shoulder with his hand. he is such a bro? he is such a bro!
with that, he pads back to the couch, a conversation is had, and they both disappear for the next few hours. this is going great… ]
if it makes thorns feel any better, alhaitham ends up sleeping on their sofa bed. not only that? it'll be his first weekend in a long, long time where he isn't rudely awakened earlier than he should be.
but that is also because elysium drags alhaitham to do their monthly costco run instead. they come back with a normal haul and one chicken. wild. ]
at least, thorns won't be there. he ends up going to the modeling place to finalize some things. they don't want to do a shoot, but they do take some headshots and generic poses so that he can add them to a basic portfolio that he doesn't have, and then gives him the info for an actual shoot they want to have at a park at a later date.
he returns to the apartment wondering if he made a mistake but it's fine..... ]
[ he's done nothing except exactly what he said he was going to do.
meanwhile, thorns gets to contemplate the increased expendable income he can now funnel into his alcohol problem… wow.
the catch to all of this, of course, is that actively trying to date other people seriously diminishes the time he can spend with thorns between school, extracurriculars, and whatever else he gets up to but never mentions. it's such a far cry from kitten. a week in, he hasn't actually asked anyone out yet; he's testing the waters and going hmmm still on the high of believing he can get out of his years long rut.
the way they probably haven't acknowledged each other's existence. it's kind of funny witnessing two introverts from the sidelines. still, i guess thorns can have his nightmare scenario. he can eventually come home to them watching a documentary, elysium just
thorns pauses when he sees this, like he is trying very hard to process what he's witnessing, and then he just makes a beeline for his room.
listen at least when elysium was pining he never got to witness thorns sitting on someone's lap. this is hell. he closes his door quietly behind him and decides to crawl into bed at 6pm because it's how he is coping. ]
[ okay if he caught thorns in someone's lap he would at least realise how little of a chance he has and eventually come to terms with it. maybe.
but what happens immediately after is elysium crawling out of his lap like, 'that was weird, let's never do that again,' while alhaitham only grunts in apparent agreement. the realisation hits: dating your friends is kind of hard, isn't it…
guy who has very little practical dating experience because he spent so much of his youth PINING with one or two casual flings just to see if they would fix him. they did not.
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no subject
[ for someone who usually dodges his own problems, it's almost funny how directly he's facing this one. being with thorns again comes with its own highs and lows, but at least this madness is different from the kind they'd have in a toxic, codependent mess. there's the dawning realisation that this isn't sustainable—and unlike a version of them that might've clung to each other out of desperation, there's the real risk that if they keep going like this, his worst fear will come true: that they'll end up holding each other back from happiness.
so, he has to be better. for him, for thorns. isn't that why he wants to see his girlfriend? so he can feel comforted that he's managed to move on? ]
… I don't know if what I have now is it, or if what comes next will be, but I've decided it's a feeling worth chasing. That's all you can really do. Chase it on your own time, and if it comes, it comes.
[ his hand stills on the dial of the car radio, and after a moment, he turns it off. ]
It's nothing to rush yourself over. Nothing good comes out of being unprepared, anyway. Just know I'll be here. Whatever shape it takes, whatever you decide it is… I'll be supporting you.
[ elysium hinge era real ]
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thorns is aware of the irony in all of this. there is just something so funny about realizing you might have a crush on someone, and that person turning to have previously liked you but is now over you and is in fact invested in dating other people. but thorns is also aware that he is the last person who is allowed to complain about these circumstances, since it all stems from how little he minded the feelings of others that he didn't even notice what elysium had been trying to tell him all those years ago.
so, he can just suck it up and wait until he gets over this, and elysium never has to know about any of it. that has to be simple, right? ]
... I'm not in any hurry. [ ... ] But good luck. I hope you get what you're looking for.
[ it seems like elysium is actively looking for love. and whether that's just to get over thorns or because he does want to find someone special to him doesn't mattter. all thorns can do is support that decision. it's what a best friend would do... although it may be easier to get over elysium if they didn't hang out as much.
he buries the thought away. ]
no subject
[ strangely, after unloading all of that, he feels lighter, like something in his chest has eased. his smile turns sheepish, and he gives thorns' shoulder a quick punch, half-playful, half in self-deprecation. ]
I talked big about my girlfriend, but… I don't think it's working out. [ SHE DOESN'T EXIST ] Still—! Thanks to this, I think I can finally start moving forward.
[ moving forward being him bringing someone new back every week… how did we get here… the vibe of if you do not fucking get along with my roommate i'm not dating you levels of insanity and are you dating me or youR ROOMMATE!!! phase two of romcom ]
You don't mind if I bring people back, huh?
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thorns blows elysium up with his mind as he wonders why couldn't he say that about the girlfriend earlier. then again, since elysium doesn't like him anymore that doesn't really matter, but it at least could have saved them some of the more awkward lines of questioning that were thrown at them.
he also can't complain about this because he had just asked to meet the girlfriend, so it makes no sense to suddenly be against other people he might date. but thorns was picturing going out somewhere to do a meeting and not walking out into his living room to see someone on elysium's lap (delusion)
of course, he doesn't voice any of this. instead he offers a thumbs up. ]
It's cool. Just try to give me a heads up if you remember to.
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just kidding. maybe. ]
Cool. Don't be shy about bringing anyone back, either. And if you need me to stay out? I got you. I'll even climb out the window if you need me to.
[ turns the audio back on so he does not have to think any deeper about thorns f*cking someone in their apartment
bye kitten ]
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thorns, meanwhile, goes back to staring out the window as he regrets every decision that brought them to this exact place. unlike elysium, thorns does not think dating around might make him move on because it takes him so long just to open up to someone to be friends.
maybe he need more... hobbies? he considers going for the modeling gig for real. ]
no subject
this does mean the rest of the ride back can finally be spent in peace. elysium doesn't have to keep pretending kitten exists just to convince thorns he's moved on, and for once, he's actually hopeful he might be able to this time, in a different way from the denial he'd had after high school. everything's out in the open, they're still friends, life is good!!
i can timeskip it to the next weekend if there's nothing else. sniffle ]
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that's fine, thorns just spends the week hating everything and messaging the modeling people to ask if they're still interested in him... they say yes... so that is now a thing. ]
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on one random day of the week, thorns will come back to find alhaitham reading on the couch. elysium is nowhere in sight. okay. ]
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this is awkward. but there's no reason to immediately jump to it being a romantic interest because elysium does actually have friends. thorns puts his stuff down and then goes to grab a drink from the fridge.
does not greet him. ]
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when elysium drops down beside him, he immediately sprawls across the rest of the couch, leaning into him and asking what he's reading. the vibe is friendly, easy. they end up talking about their classes—well, more accurately, elysium ends up talking at him about their classes, with alhaitham quietly listening even as the book remains open in his hands.
i'm dying and need this arc to end. i was going to have scien cameo but i am not strong enough? coughs up blood his questionable thorns adjacents ]
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thorns is just. well. good for him? if it's a friend then that's nice and if it's a date then that is kind of fast but also nice... he supposed...
he will just try to quietly go to his room. ]
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at some point during the evening there's a knock on thorns' door. it's elysium. ]
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Yes?
[ did he forget to do one of his chores... ]
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I can cover two-thirds of the rent this month.
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well. if they're dating then thorns would probably find out if he stays with them. ]
... Yeah, sure. Where is he going to stay?
[ the couch... elysium's room...? ]
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[ there are only so many places he could sleep, so yes, it seems his room is under consideration… ]
I wanted to get your permission before extending the offer.
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[ ... ]
I'm going to be out for most of the day tomorrow. I might get back late.
[ if the two of them would like to be.... alone.....,,,, ]
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with that, he pads back to the couch, a conversation is had, and they both disappear for the next few hours. this is going great… ]
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thorns goes back to the fridge, grabs like two beers, and returns to his room. he hates it here so bad. ]
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if it makes thorns feel any better, alhaitham ends up sleeping on their sofa bed. not only that? it'll be his first weekend in a long, long time where he isn't rudely awakened earlier than he should be.
but that is also because elysium drags alhaitham to do their monthly costco run instead. they come back with a normal haul and one chicken. wild. ]
no subject
at least, thorns won't be there. he ends up going to the modeling place to finalize some things. they don't want to do a shoot, but they do take some headshots and generic poses so that he can add them to a basic portfolio that he doesn't have, and then gives him the info for an actual shoot they want to have at a park at a later date.
he returns to the apartment wondering if he made a mistake but it's fine..... ]
no subject
meanwhile, thorns gets to contemplate the increased expendable income he can now funnel into his alcohol problem… wow.
the catch to all of this, of course, is that actively trying to date other people seriously diminishes the time he can spend with thorns between school, extracurriculars, and whatever else he gets up to but never mentions. it's such a far cry from kitten. a week in, he hasn't actually asked anyone out yet; he's testing the waters and going hmmm still on the high of believing he can get out of his years long rut.
the way they probably haven't acknowledged each other's existence. it's kind of funny witnessing two introverts from the sidelines. still, i guess thorns can have his nightmare scenario. he can eventually come home to them watching a documentary, elysium just
in this guy's lap???? okay. ]
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thorns pauses when he sees this, like he is trying very hard to process what he's witnessing, and then he just makes a beeline for his room.
listen at least when elysium was pining he never got to witness thorns sitting on someone's lap. this is hell. he closes his door quietly behind him and decides to crawl into bed at 6pm because it's how he is coping. ]
no subject
but what happens immediately after is elysium crawling out of his lap like, 'that was weird, let's never do that again,' while alhaitham only grunts in apparent agreement. the realisation hits: dating your friends is kind of hard, isn't it…
guy who has very little practical dating experience because he spent so much of his youth PINING with one or two casual flings just to see if they would fix him. they did not.
hmmmmmmmmmm
ten minutes later: ]
Do you want dinner?
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