[ he shakes his head and pokes elysium on the cheek. ]
No... Go and wash up.
[ thorns doesn't know if elysium will start doing skincare and it would be a punishment to have to sit there waiting for elysium to apply ten different creams to his face. ]
elysium isn't dragging anyone anywhere, but thorns will still get up and dutifully follow after him even though he will be useless here. he hovers at the doorway. ]
[ he lines up various bottles on the counter. he washes his face. he wants to go back to bed so bad. getting up was a mistake but now he's up and committed (this is stupid) ]
... We can spend time here. We spent a while traveling.
[ is this an excuse to let elysium rest up? absolutely. but there really isn't anywhere they can go at the moment; it's not like thorns can easily carry both elysium and groceries. they truly need to get a cart asap. ]
[ why does he have violent urges in both threads at the same time
he tells himself to relax… this is the love of his life… his grip turns into a vice grip. ]
Self-care is meant to be taken slow. And no—toner's to help your skin's absorption, so it has to sit under everything else…
[ how does thorns understand aftercare but not this. he guides thorns into his arms, head canted to the side. he is taking matters into his own hands. HE IS GOING FIRST!!!! ]
[ thorns can experience the joy of living with another person when his 3-in-1s keep going missing. there is only shampoo, conditioner, and cleanser all in their separate bottles. likelier is thorns only bothering to use shampoo and forgoing everything else while elysium keeps wondering why the shampoo keeps running out well before the others, but that's a future problem! ]
Maybe. But you don't put your chemicals in all at once when you're experimenting, do you? There's an order to these things. One reaction leads to another—skincare is as much a science as anything else…
[ funny, elysium could say the same about intimacy. the moment thorns is in his arms, he's immediately mollified and wonders why he was even angry to begin with? this is a good excuse to keep thorns in one place and touch him. wow.
he gently slaps thorns' cheeks with toner. plap. ]
[ elysium should have tried this explanation on thorns ages ago because it suddenly clicks into place for him. does that mean he will suddenly be good at applying anything? no. but he immediately understands why there is an order to things.
[ he is truly struggling to imagine himself as an assistant because his patience is below the ground on these matters, but he will try to do it for elysium.... he supposes he is one in certain aspects. ]
[ reaches for the low-hanging fruit. annoying. but next up is moisturiser… yippee. in the form of little dots on every part of thorns' face. watches as thorns learns nothing from this and just plaps a giant blob on one cheek and smears it around. ]
Should I find one to put on for you? We don't have to work the profession to have fun.
[ he is already forgetting they're broke. also, he has so many stupid things on his list already he'll never have money again… ]
[ his money has always gone into stupid shit it's just more egregious now considering their circumstances… but it's okay. ice soup for sexy lingerie and cosplay sounds like a fair trade.
You're really into this. Should I do what you do? Just hand you questionable chemicals and hope for the best?
[ that is what scien did too, but alas. he is not thorns and so he must now die for his transgressions. ]
Hmm. But I'm more into other kinds of experiments. Like annoying you on purpose to see how much I can get away with. Or——how many kisses it'll take until you forgive me. Those're tons more fun.
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however, he is still in the just woke up stupor so he just rolls off of him like a lump. ]
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Did you want to sleep in? I can stay here with you.
[ until he falls asleep… he does need to use the washroom… ]
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No... Go and wash up.
[ thorns doesn't know if elysium will start doing skincare and it would be a punishment to have to sit there waiting for elysium to apply ten different creams to his face. ]
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You said you'd help me. You have ten minutes before I drag you by the scruff of your neck.
[ sadly he does not have his ten different creams. only the bare minimum of what he takes to travel, so… two. three if you count sunscreen.
he gets up, almost falls. … he doesn't say anything and just waddles the rest of the way to the bathroom.
]
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elysium isn't dragging anyone anywhere, but thorns will still get up and dutifully follow after him even though he will be useless here. he hovers at the doorway. ]
Should I carry you?
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No…
[ maybe. ]
What did you want to do today?
[ he lines up various bottles on the counter. he washes his face. he wants to go back to bed so bad. getting up was a mistake but now he's up and committed (this is stupid) ]
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[ is this an excuse to let elysium rest up? absolutely. but there really isn't anywhere they can go at the moment; it's not like thorns can easily carry both elysium and groceries. they truly need to get a cart asap. ]
Maybe we can stop by a shop later.
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[ more importantly?? he taps a bottle, then the next. he slaps his cheeks with his hands and looks at thorns imploringly. ]
Toner, then moisturiser. Even applications of both. You can remember that much, right?
[ he sounds so doubtful ]
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he should probably ask this but it's fine. he takes the bottles... ]
Yeah. Easy.
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elysium has a bad feeling about this and gingerly places a hand on thorns'. this can't be how their relationship explodes again… ]
Wait. I can do you first.
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[ yes, thorns, that's the problem.
he looks at the items. ]
Can I just mix it into one container?
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he tells himself to relax… this is the love of his life… his grip turns into a vice grip. ]
Self-care is meant to be taken slow. And no—toner's to help your skin's absorption, so it has to sit under everything else…
[ how does thorns understand aftercare but not this. he guides thorns into his arms, head canted to the side. he is taking matters into his own hands. HE IS GOING FIRST!!!! ]
Here.
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but he allows elysium to manhandle him, not because he thinks he needs to learn anything but simply because he enjoys elysium touching him. ]
This feels overcomplicated.
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Maybe. But you don't put your chemicals in all at once when you're experimenting, do you? There's an order to these things. One reaction leads to another—skincare is as much a science as anything else…
[ funny, elysium could say the same about intimacy. the moment thorns is in his arms, he's immediately mollified and wonders why he was even angry to begin with? this is a good excuse to keep thorns in one place and touch him. wow.
he gently slaps thorns' cheeks with toner. plap. ]
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plap plap. ]
Maybe you're a scientist in another life.
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Only if you're an assistant in that same life. Can you imagine?
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You'd look good in a lab coat.
[ thorns doesn't wear those. ]
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[ reaches for the low-hanging fruit. annoying. but next up is moisturiser… yippee. in the form of little dots on every part of thorns' face. watches as thorns learns nothing from this and just plaps a giant blob on one cheek and smears it around. ]
Should I find one to put on for you? We don't have to work the profession to have fun.
[ he is already forgetting they're broke. also, he has so many stupid things on his list already he'll never have money again… ]
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thorns reaches over to flick elysium on the nose. he is not paying any mind to how elysium is applying this. ]
I don't need one.
[ BUT ELYSIUM DOES? ]
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elysium just sniffs. ]
Then that makes you my test subject.
[ this is about to get unethical so fast ]
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[ elysium probably said this to scien in the other thread and then it killed him.
but it's fine here. ]
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[ that is what scien did too, but alas. he is not thorns and so he must now die for his transgressions. ]
Hmm. But I'm more into other kinds of experiments. Like annoying you on purpose to see how much I can get away with. Or——how many kisses it'll take until you forgive me. Those're tons more fun.
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[ thorns temporarily forgot what flirting was for a second there to instead be pedantic. ]
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he decides it's unsalvageable. ]
I'm done. It's your turn.
[ an imaginary tear runs down his cheek ]
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but thorns will take the toner and wordlessly start applying it to elysium. plap plap. ]
You look disappointed.
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